No.1 Notes on Rest & Slowing Down
Rest is a practice I'm still finding my footing with. As easy as it is to say "Take a break" and "Just rest this weekend" it's still not that simple for me most days to get my entire ecosystem to rest. I often find that my body is on rest mode but my mind has grown wings and decided to fly around with the anxiety bees and do anything and everything except rest. I feel it's half a learned behavior and half out of my control. I think for a long time I equated being busy for leisure or work equated to living fully and being present because you're constantly engaging in something.
Now at 26 and not getting any younger, I crave slowness, stillness and intentional energy spending. but I've realized that in some ways my lifestyle hasn't always supported that way of living. I did so much in college from poetry, slam, partying going to events, getting food with friends and the list goes on lol It has caused me to rethink what I want to do long term and the changes that I'll need to make to better support myself and the form I'm taking. Dealing with physical and mental health problems and challenges changes how I rest in a lot of ways, many that I'm still discovering and figuring out in therapy.
I told my therapist in on our sessions that I rarely rest fully. Some part of me rests while the others stay awake which only fills my cup so much. I definitely think rest is underrated and we all need to spend more time figuring out how we define rest and participate in that practice. I use to think that not needing rest was a good thing but that's not very human of me to think that this entire ecosystem I care for, tend to, and nourish within doesn't need time to heal and recharge . It's a hard and emotional process for me with unlearning and relearning myself but also quite satisfying at the same time.
Hope you all are well.